My sister tried to convince me that her dogs are less of a hassle than my kids. While Im not sure Ill trade my daughter for a Doberman yet, I thought she made a few good points. 1. Dogs will love you unconditionally forever. Kids will love you unconditionally until they are two; then refusal of candy or toys will result in a loud, I hate you! 2. A dog treat and a scratch behind the ears will go a long way. Kids prefer bikes, cars, and ballet lessons. 3. When your dog does something wrong, he will stare up with big eyes and whimper apologetically. When your child does something wrong, they will first protest that someone else did it and then insist you are the worst parent ever. 4. Dogs make an occasional mess on the floor in the first few months of their lives. Kids spend two or more years in diapers, then make an occasional mess on the floor while potty training. 5. Dogs will eat your homework (or job work) on demand. Kids, on the other hand, will steadfastly refuse what you feed them. 6. At bedtime, your dog will turn three times and go right to sleep. Kids will demand water, stories, extra hugs, and monster repellant until after YOUR bedtime. 7. Dogs will shed fur on your furniture. Kids will color on the walls. The fur comes off easier. 8. A dog can get by if it never learns to sit or roll over. If you dont teach your kids to read or behave, however, the consequences will be disastrous. 9. You can take the dog to the vet and get it fixed. Teenagers must be monitored far more carefully. 10. On a long car trip, your dog will stick its head out the window. Your kids will ask Are we there yet? every five minutes. |
